Episode 4 #2: Constantine's date

Phuket, schmuket. Let's start with Ashley's Abs! And the mockery of date planning with the hotel concierge. As if.

How shallow is Ashley? Quantified with numbers, please. My guess is that she spent...30 minutes with Bentley. And despite a warning, she'd already put him in a tux at the finale, pictured a wedding, chicken dinner, champagne, children, and a white picket fence. And now she's still reeling from losing...what? Is the outcome more doomed for Ashley than ANY PREVIOUS CONTESTANT? Odds please. With numbers.

Lucky Constantine scores the bad weather date. Shoot. The original plan is scrubbed. Is Ashley actually going to have to come up with another plan? Like really? Like, on her own? Doubtful. Dad wonders if they're going to end up in the red light district while they wander through town. And he prophesies she's going to decide he's really the kind of guy she could spend her life with. But then the most profound piece of advice she hears from the old married guy is that you shouldn't try to compete in a relationship. If this is news to her...ouch.

Shoot. That is one pretty town.

And...we're still talking about Bentley. About strong and real feelings. What we learn from the Bachelorette: Don't EVER trust your feelings. You shouldn't even have feelings. Feelings will ruin you and lead you into traitorous relationships. The Bachelorette is the murderer of feelings.

These two seem to be having a genuinely solid, productive, normal conversation. I like this boy. And not moving in at the first opportunity for the smooth-mover kiss? I like it, but with this girl, in this setting, is it actually the kiss of DEATH? (Duh-duh-duh.)